Celeste Headlee writes in We Need To Talk "“It seems like we rarely converse anymore. I mean, we talk and we chat (often over text or e-mail), but we don’t really hash things out. We spend a lot of time avoiding uncomfortable conversations and not enough time making an effort to understand the people who live and work around us.”

This is so relevant to what you have described. Good conversations require genuine interest in another person, their world and their interests.